I will never forget when my struggle with weight started.
My life changed during the summer before I started 4th grade. I obviously spent more time eating than playing outside, because all of a sudden I was fat. My big brother was the one who first brought it to my attention; unfortunately, it wasn’t in a nice way, because he was making fun of me.
I didn’t know how to react because this was my first time being teased about something so serious. This was not a very good summer for me. My cousins, uncles, grandmother, and even my daddy made comments about my weight. I was 9 years old and didn’t know what to do. My mother was the only one who never said anything negative, she always saw the bright side and said I would outgrow it.
The summer soon ended and it was time to return to school, I thought things at school would be the same, but to my surprise, the kids at school were able to see that I had gained weight, and they didn’t hesitate to let me know. It hurt so bad to be teased, it was like a total shock. I thought if I wore certain types of clothes, like long shirts to cover my thighs, then people couldn’t tell that I was fat, but that didn’t work. I also thought that if I wore name brand shoes and clothes that it would at least take the attention away from my weight. I asked my mother to buy me a pair of “Dopeman” Nikes because they were in style at the time. I had the Nikes, but I was still fat and that didn’t stop the kids from teasing.
I did manage to get a boyfriend during that school year. His name was Marcus, we were in the same class, I was so surprised that he wanted to be my boyfriend; I thought maybe he didn’t think I was fat and that’s why he liked me. Our little relationship had a few issues because other boys in the class would tease him for having a fat girlfriend. This didn’t help my self-esteem at all! It was like I couldn’t even have a boyfriend because I was fat. What was I supposed to do?
As I got older, things got worse. I believe 7th grade was when I just wanted to hide from the world and become invisible. Now it was time to start Jr. High School which brought on a whole load of things I wasn’t ready for, but I will discuss how my self-image lead me to become an attention seeker in a later post.
I signed up for athletics, hoping it would help me lose weight and perhaps make the Volleyball or Basketball team. If I lost weight and made a team, my popularity would boast and I would feel better about myself. I had to go to the doctor to have a physical in order to participate in athletics; that’s when I found out was 156 pounds at 12 years old. My mother assured me that I would lose weight and not to worry. Unfortunately, I did not make any sports teams and had to sit in the off-season the whole year, so there went my plan.
This story can go on for hours, so how about you leave your questions and comments below and I will add to this post accordingly.
Thanks for reading!
Thank you for sharing such a personal struggle. You mention that your mother would pretty much say that your weight would “fix” itself, but what advice do you have for parents who see their child(ren), boy or girl, not losing weight as they get older?
Hey Michell!
The advice I have for parents, is to encourage your child to be more active. Go on walks after school around the park. Use that time to talk and bond. Also when it comes to food I would join my child in healthy eating and help him/her understand how important it is to minimize junk food.
I agree that parents would have to make more of a sacrifice to encourage healthy eating habits and consistent exercise. Knowing what you know now, what advice would you give your 9 year old self?
When I was 9, I had no idea what was considered good and bad food. I wish the internet was around back then because I would have used it to find ways to control my weight. Since that wasn’t an option for me I would tell my 9 year old self “you are beautiful just the way you are, and if you don’t like your body do a fun activity ( such as dancing) to make exercise a regular part of life.” I love dancing, and now Zumba is one of my favorite forms of exercise.